HE’S NOT YOURS! HIM ENTERTAINING OTHER WOMEN SAYS SO!

Neya!

I read your post about clarifying your relationship. What really stuck out to me, is when you said that it’s not you and him against the world if he hasn’t told you that. Well, what if he tells you that? What if he says that it’s just you and him, and that it’s “us” against the world, but he won’t clearly define the relationship, and he still talks to other girls.

Girl Help!

Hey, Girl Help!

I don’t know if this is your situation, so do not get offended when I say “you”He’ within my answer.

So it sounds like you’re dealing with a typical manipulative casanova. You know, the guy who wants several pieces of cake, and plans to eat every piece. He tells you everything you want to hear, because it sounds good, but his actions don’t line up. I know it’s easy to believe a man, when he says all of the right things, but remember his actions will always be loud and clear.

Clearly he is a liar.

Despite what he says, it is not you and him against the world because you know there are other girls in the picture. You do not have to allow him to treat you like you’re one of his options. Do not put yourself through the hurt he is setting you up for.

Think about it, if you move into an exclusive relationship with this man those other girls aren’t going anywhere. They’re there now, and he’s trying to make you believe that you’re his one and only, so what makes you think they’re leaving anytime soon? In essence, he’s telling you what you want to hear, but showing you what you don’t need in a relationship. Truth is, he could be saying the same thing to those other girls.

You are not alone, I’ve been there. I was talking to a guy and he talked about us getting married, for years! In my mind he treated me good. We had good open communication, he bought me the things I liked, and whatever I needed emotionally, he provided. I later realized that he had set me up for hurt. He was doing the same for another young lady.

That’s when it all clicked. He talked to me about marriage, but we weren’t even in a relationship. That doesn’t add up…at all. I was wrapped up in his words, and his actions lined up good enough for me. I dismissed the red flags that were waving in my face, because, he pacified me. He told me what he thought I wanted to hear, but I had to pick myself up and find my happy, and you have to do the same.

In your situation, realize that you are being pacified with his words. He is not committing to you. He’s committing to himself, doing what makes him happy, and right now that’s you and the other girls he’s talking to. Know that it is okay, don’t be upset, don’t go crazy, it’s a learning experience.

Realize now that you’re worth more than pretty words. Commit to yourself, and do what makes you happy. I’m sure treating him like a priority, while you’re his option isn’t what makes you happy. You are worthy enough to be someone’s priority.

For advice on your relationship email: thetruth@baddiegirl.com