Tag Archives Love

Picture it!

You’ve been working all day. You finally get home, and  you get that one phone call you’ve been waiting for, from the one person you actually want to talk to: your new boo. Although you all just started talking, you can tell he really likes you. It’s obvious that he’s been thinking of you and wanting to call you and now you both can enjoy each other’s conversation.

Yea, that crap isn’t happening like it used to.

I’m coming to the harsh realization that we live in a society that values texting. Texting has become the way of life for so many people. So much that the younger generation is teaching their grandparents how to text!

Lord help.

I cannot stand texting. My patience runs thin when I have to wait for an answer, I know I can get instantly through a phone call. I’ve gone through some serious anxiety waiting for a text response, especially from a man. Not again. If I need you, I will call you; friend, man or relative.

My friends know I hate texting so they usually make an effort to call me, or at least treat me as if I’m a priority call if I do call. (Thank you y’all!) On the other hand, some of my friends have become just horrible with phone calls, but can text you back so fast you’ll still be one the phone waiting for them to pick up. They don’t even realize that this is a problem.

If you can’t communicate effectively through a phone with your girlfriends, how good is your communication with your man?

I’m only being honest.

The other day, me and my girlfriend went out for drinks. Her face was buried into her phone. Of course she was texting her boo. So I asked, “How often do y’all talk on the phone, you know, having an actual voice-to-voice conversation?” She hesitated, then answered, “often.” That little heifa couldn’t tell me the last time they had spoken on the phone. She blamed it on her not being a “phone person,” whatever that is. She thought it was funny, because, I, of course, turned it into an Oprah moment and got on her about it.

What did I tell her?

If that man ain’t over seas fighting for the Country, you should have an actual phone conversation at least two to three times a week. That’s if you all are serious about each other, or moving into being serious with each other. Along with some more of my opinion.

Listen. “Good morning,” and “Have a nice day” texts are sweet, but if you and your boo, aren’t having actual phone conversations, there is a problem. Trust me when I say this, you are NOT the only one getting those sweet text messages throughout the day.

Read: How To Not Loose Focus When You Get Those Sweet Text Messages

I, like a few others on this Earth, value a good phone conversation. Communicating through the phone allows you to become more intimate, and personal. This is the most important reason why you need to talk on the phone. Talking on the phone let’s you in on who a person really is, if you haven’t gone on that first date just yet. You can also learn things about your boo, if you pay attention. Here are a few things you can learn from talking to your boo thang over the phone.

If He Can Hold A Conversation of Substance

You both should be active in the conversation.  However, if he can’t hold your attention over the phone, imagine what will happen on a date. You’ can’t go to the movies forever! While on the phone, there may be a few awkward silences, this isn’t a bad thing, but see how he handles them. Does he just sit there, and listen to you breathe? Does he make small talk, or ask you something interesting? This can easily let you know what type of man he is.

What You All Really Have In Common

“What’s your favorite…” is cute in the beginning, but he should be asking questions that go into the depth of you as a person. You want to be on the same page. See how deep he goes into learning more about you, and what you all have in common. This will tell you if he’s interested in you, or what’s between your legs.  If you realize you aren’t interested in him, you won’t be able to hide or deny it.

Whether Or Not He Talks To You Or Talks At You

All I will say about this is, you will be able to tell if he actually pays attention to you and the things you say, or if he’s self-absorbed and only wants to talk about himself. It doesn’t matter how long you all have known each other, he should be interested in getting to know who you are as a person of interest, not his homeboy.

I will talk more in depth  about this at a later date.

If He’s Really All He Claims to Be

You can’t hide that you aren’t as intellectual as you claim to be on social networks while on the phone. He’s bound to show you his true colors at some point. Ask trick questions if you have to! It’s going to get real. If you have yet to go out with your new boo, you’ll be able to see him in his true essence over the phone. When you start seeing him for who he really is, assess whether he has potential to be something serious, or if he needs to sit over in the friend zone.

Stop texting so much! Pick up the phone and see what that man is really about. I’m not saying go call your boo right now. I am saying there should be more to your relationship than texting, especially in the beginning. One day tell him that you can’t text at that moment, and you will call him in about 20 minutes. See how he reacts. If you do call, and he doesn’t pick up, or call you back, and this happens at least twice, you know you’re not the only one, and he may not be that into you. Sorry boo. Go talk to somebody who wants to talk to you, and learn more about who you really are.

For advice on your relationships email: thetruth@baddiegirl.com